Wednesday, 23 February 2011

I don't think I'll eat a Cadbury Mini Egg again!

After work last night I nipped to the local Tesco Express to get some carrots for dinner and also for the guinea pigs.  Incidentally, Tesco only had carrot batons and is it just me or do they taste different from normal whole carrot-shaped carrots?  Anyway, I grabbed a bag of carrot batons and some other bits and pieces and I joined the queue.

The man in front of me had his shopping basket on the floor and he was pushing it along with his foot as the queue moved.  When the shop assistant called, 'Next please!' the man in front of me bent down to pick up his basket and as he did so his trousers fell down.

Now, I know it's de rigueur for many man-youths to walk about the place with their trousers practically around their knees, displaying their undercrackers to all and sundry, but this was different.

This forty-something man's trousers, which were some kind of lightweight tracksuit bottoms, fell down to his ankles ...

... AND HE HAD NO UNDERPANTS ON!

It was like the world slowed down at that point.  The next few seconds seemed like minutes.

One second I was stood there minding my own business with my basket of shopping and the next thing I knew there was a pair of exposed man buttocks - there, right there - in front of my face!

My eyes saw the naked bottom and they kind of went, "Hey?  Oh!  OH NO! What in the name of ... ?!" and then my eyes darted to the Cadbury Mini Egg stand where they intently studied the bags, big bags of small bags and tubes of tiny sugary chocolate eggs.  Down the side of my eye I could see the man, still bent over, desperately pulling his trousers back up.  The female shop assistant was in stitches and it wasn't until later that I realised she was IN FRONT of him so goodness knows what she saw.
The bottom-barer hurried over to the till, paid for his goods and scuttled out of the door, probably very grateful for the hood of his jacket which was hiding his face.  After he left the shop a wave of snorts and giggles erupted from all the onlookers.  When the shop assistant had recovered from her laughter she said to me, "I wonder if he'll ever show his face in here again?" to which I replied, "Or his bum!" and we all laughed again.

Sadly, I think my mind will now forever associate Cadbury Mini Eggs with the image of that man's unclad bottom.

And it wasn't even a nice bottom.

26 Comments

Purple Princess Designs said...

Laughed all over again, oh my goodness me, I just wish I'd been there too, just hilarious.

thank you so much for sharing that with us, it's really cheered me up .. twice now. excellent.

still sniggering, I love that last comment too, about 'it wasn't even a nice bottom!' fantastic!

love to the guinea pigs too
x

Rushy said...

In the 21st century even the flashers are getting smart!

Laura said...

Glad it made you smile, Pauline!

Rushy - It did cross my mind that it wasn't accidental but he did do a very good job of being embarrassed. It was an almost-farcical moment.

Caroline B said...

Oh my! In years to come you'll still be sniggering every time you eat a Mini Egg. Puts a whole new meaning to the phrase 'just popped out to the supermarket'....

fhiona galloway said...

LOL! Love this story Laura.,
honestly it must have made your week really :D

Kc said...

Oh Laura, I haven't laughed that much in a long time, thank you, that will remain with me for the rest of ther day!!

trinket box said...

Haha! Brilliant!!! x
PS. The word verification code for this was 'gangsta' haha.

mary said...

You might get two posts from me as tried already but not convinced it worked. Thanks for making me laugh. I did a big snorty laugh, which made the poor dog jump. Very funny- I'll also not be able to look at mini eggs without remembering your tale!

Mary x

horimarika said...

First I saw your title... but I could never figure out what this post is about! I loved reading it. And guess many of your readers will always smile whenever see Mini Eggs.... I will!

Sue Doran said...

LOL, priceless! :-)

FloRaeMe said...

That is the funniest thing I have read in ages!

But you won't believe this one - my comment moderation word is...wait for it...you really won't believe it.....GONADS!!

Somebody has to have set that one up!!!

Louby said...

Just passin through, found you on the "next blog" button. thanks for making me laugh soooo much when I read your "mini egg" story. Hilarious. Lovely blog too.
Louby x

moonlitfantaseas said...

that was so funny..

Patty said...

Eeek.

hello gorgeous said...

ROFLMFAO!!!!! laughing so hard at the thought....what will the Easter Bunny leave you I wonder??

Gave me a laugh during a stressful time, thanks chick {even tho' it wasn't pleasant your end.... haha! "rear" end!! :oD }

hugs

hello gorgeous xxx

Sooz said...

I laughed for ages, then read it to my daughter and laughed again. Poor bloke.

Cassandra said...

Yes, definitely one for the daughter to read! Very, very funny. I am surprised it does not happen more often the way some people wear their pants. My husband gets round it (he is round) by wearing braces. Keep on posting!

blue eyed night owl said...

Aw, hope you'll get over that soon;) Makes a great story though!

Jonah the dog said...

Ha, karma for u laughing at old Mike's trunks incident at hydrotherapy!! I got the front view and I bet Mr Mini Eggs was younger!! Mucho lol all evening x

Sandy Cannings said...

Giggled again reading this after your tweet last night! Hilarious and well narrated! I picked up a bag of mini eggs earlier but got the same vision as you did and opted for a bar of Galaxy instead! I can see sales of mini eggs going down this Easter! LOL

Thanks for sharing the hilarity Laura!

Love Sandy xx

Anonymous said...

Oh my goodness, thats hilarious :-)

Lisapmac

Laura said...

Really pleased that this story gave you all a giggle!

I'm also pleased to report that I returned to Tesco Express this afternoon and I had a straightforward, no-naked-bottoms shopping experience.

Laura x

Cinnamon Jewellery said...

Priceless!

Vicky wan said...

Too funny. I'm crying I'm laughing so much :D

Onykahonie said...

Haha! That was hilarious! I agree about the carrot batons btw!

Francesca DeCaire said...

I read this post while breast feeding in bed this morning. New daddy kept wondering what baby Lucas was doing that was so funny. Gotta love the iPhone. Thanks for making me laugh.