Cliff Richard. No. Just no.

I've just witnessed something awful. Sir Cliff Richard was on the lottery show a minute ago singing a terrible, terrible song. And not just singing but trying to dance in a highly disturbing way - kind of simultaneously squatting and swaying. He was even doing the reaching-up-and-clutching-at-the-air thing that Westlife do. What the hell is he thinking? I think I know. He's thinking that he's still got it.

Newsflash, Cliff - you haven't.

EDIT - Just found last night's Cliff performance on YouTube. Click here if you dare .....