General update

Remember the spiral stringer bead from the last post? Well, here it is as part of its set. That vibrant acid yellow-green is new CiM 'Oobleck' and I will be writing more about it shortly, along with my thoughts on a few of the other new Creation is Messy colours.

I'm still getting back into the beadmaking after a couple of months away from it. I don't think I posted about it here, but I gave up my archaeology degree. Here's what I posted on my Facebook page about this:

"You know how you shouldn’t do something if it makes you unhappy? If you’re not happy in a relationship, or your job, or just in your general life situation, we’re advised to change it if we can, right? Because life’s too short and all that. Well, I’ve made a change and… I am no longer a student.

I started my archaeology degree because I wanted to learn more about the subject and I wanted to get myself a qualification that would allow me to get a good and interesting job if I wanted to at some point in the future. The course started off OK. I was loving it and I was doing well as far as grades go. However, in about November I began to hate it. I hated the workload, the pressure, the having to write in a totally unnatural, wanky academic fashion (if I’d done uni when I was supposed to, I’d probably have found academic writing as a 40 year old a lot easier), and I began to hate the subject. I began to hate it to the point where watching history and archaeology programmes made me feel sick. In fact, I couldn’t watch them because I felt like some kind of fraud. How could I watch Alice Roberts enthusing over some old coins or a fossilised Viking turd, when inside me I had this gnawing “I don’t want to be doing this degree” feeling?

I have a shelf full of utterly fascinating archaeology and history books that I haven’t had time to read properly because I was only using them to scan through and pick out relevant references and quotes. That’s a waste of books.

I said to myself I’d give the first few months of my second year a go and see how I felt. Well, I did that and I felt bad. There’s no fun in reading stuff that makes absolutely no sense to you, no matter how much you translate it and use the BBC Bitesize website to help you try and understand it. And when you have to regurgitate all that stuff your eyes have read but your brain didn’t understand, in the form of 8000 words written in the absolutely correct way, well… basically I was buggered. Yes, I could have struggled on. Yes, I could have just done the best I could for the next two years, but you know what? When I can’t sleep for worry, when I keep getting styes (my number one “You are run down, Laura” signal), when I want to vom every time someone asks me how the degree is going, when I feel that weight of dread in my stomach whenever I look at any of the books or papers, and when I simply feel so unhappy every day, it is not worth it.

I thought vocalising my “I want to quit” thoughts to my husband would make me feel like a failure. But I don’t. I know I’ve made the correct decision because of the feeling of utter relief and lightness I’ve experienced since quitting. I had a go at being a uni student. I thoroughly enjoyed some of it. My love for archaeology and history remains, but now I will learn about it in my own way, in my own time, and without having to cite every single ruddy thing I ever want to communicate. (Tits to you, Harvard referencing!)

TL;DR – I quit my archaeology degree because it was making me unhappy."

So there you go. Back to the beads I go. I have missed them and I even tidied up the shed last week!

My workbench, before and after the tidy-up

My shed is still the same undecorated and unfancy wooden box it's always been, but it's a lot more uncluttered than it was. Here are some of the beads I've made post-tidy:

'Fiery' Potpourri

'Sage' Luminobeads

'Purquoise' Spotties

In other news, I'm still running. I don't know what I'd have done without my running during the whole degree worry stuff. It kept me sane. I ran my first 10K race last month and in September I'm doing a half marathon. You can read all about my running over on my running blog if you like, and I've set up an Instagram account for all my red-sweaty-faced running pictures.

This week's shed listening has been The Cuckoo's Calling by Robert Galbraith/J.K. Rowling. I listened to the third book in the Cormoran Strike series, Career of Evil, after watching the BBC adaptations of the first two stories, so then I went back to listen to the actual books.

Gratuitous photo of Tom Burke as Cormoran Strike

The books are far more detailed than the television programmes and you learn way more about the characters. I'll be getting The Silkworm when my next Audible credit comes through. The Strike audiobooks are narrated by Robert Glenister and he does a marvellous job of it.

Right! Off to the shed for me. Its black and white today, I think, possibly with a splash of that Oobleck thrown into the mix.

Pebbles aplenty

I've finally reached the end of my first two degree modules. I submitted my essays on Tuesday night and now I have to wait a month to see if they weren't complete twaddle. I'm not expecting amazing marks; I'd just like passes. We shall see...

I now have a study-free month and I've been down the shed this week making beads. The resulting 'pebble' beads that are pictured withing this post are mainly about glass, shape and texture, as opposed to stringer and precise patterning. The tumble-etching makes them so beautifully smooth and they're ever so soothing to touch. Little glass worry beads.

I listened to Into the Water by Paula Hawkins as I made beads this week and oh, that was a good'un. Proper gripping. I do enjoy an audiobook while I work. I can't listen to words, either sung or spoken, while I study (I end up focusing on that rather than what I'm supposed to be reading) so I've missed my audiobook and podcast listening and I've got lots to catch up on. Also, telly-wise, OBVIOUSLY Line of Duty series four, obviously, but did you see Big Little Lies too? That was great. I've read all but one of Liane Moriarty's books and the Nicole Kidman and Reese Witherspoon adaptation of Big Little Lies was perfect. Hard to watch at times, but perfect.

All of the glassy pebbles pictured are currently available in my webshop. I'm expecting a glass delivery on Monday so expect some different coloured pebbles soon.

Archaeoramblings

I've never read so much in my entire life.

And I read quite a lot.

But nothing could have prepared me for just how much reading this degree would involve. I mean, I've had to buy a secondary bookcase for the lounge. And thank goodness for Amazon's second hand booksellers. Mind you, how they make money by selling books for a penny I don't know, but I'm very grateful for them, except for the one who sold me a 'very good condition' Chris Stringer book about Neanderthals. When it arrived it absolutely reeked of Creosote and Deep Heat. I have no idea what the previous owner had been doing with it but I had to spend a whole other penny on a different copy (and no, I don't mean that kind of spend a penny) because there was no way I could have read the stinky one. It upset my nostrils!

Nigel likes to 'help' me study

But yes, I've basically spent the last two months reading. Reading about human evolution, early prehistory, and general archaeology ideas and methods. I've been to talks and lectures, I've been to museums, and I've handled casts of early hominin skulls.

Although I'm doing my degree with the University of Leicester, I'm really lucky to live in Cambridge where we've got this pretty famous University. They've just done the Science Festival and as part of it I went to an open day at the Leverhulme Centre for Human Evolutionary Studies and I got to speak to all the superclever academic types (which was great but I wish I knew how they get all that knowledge into their brains and keep it there) about fossils and bones and hominins. I also watched the incredible John Lord do a two hour flintknapping demonstration, which was absolutely amazing.

John Lord making a flint hand axe

John Lord flint flakes, or blades, that are now mine

I'm utterly surprised at how much I am loving the early prehistory thing. When I started my course I had a choice of six modules for my first year, and I had to choose five. I was stuck between sacking off Early Prehistory or The Archaeology of Egypt, Nubia and the Middle Nile. I was all "Meh, stone age cave stuff  and mummies and pyramids all sound a bit yawny to me" and I dropped the Egypt one. I cannot tell you how pleased I am that I opted to do the early prehistory. Sure, maybe I'm missing out on the mummies and the pyramids, but it turns out I love the human evolution thing. Love it. So much so, I am currently wearing an 'I heart Neanderthals' t-shirt (which Chris has banned me from wearing when I'm out and about with him), I have two shelves full of evolution books, and I'm planning a trip to Grime's Graves as soon as I am free from my essay-writing shackles. I can recognise and name (and spell) all the basic standard hominin skulls, and I will fight anybody who says that the Neanderthals were stupid or ugly or slow. So yeah, woohoo human evolution! I like it.

And that's just one module. I'm doing two at a time as I am doing my degree full time. This explains why I've had zero time for beads. The other module I'm working on is archaeology aims and methods; general introductory stuff about what archaeology is and why, where and how we do it - surveys, techniques, digging, post-excavation and all that malarkey. But it also involves bones. Human skeletons. And I realise this makes me sound strange but I am a tad obsessed with the human remains side of things. I've discovered that a lot of people are weirded out by this; I can almost see them recoil when my eyes light up as I'm talking about it. I'm well aware that there are ethical issues surrounding the archaeology of human remains and I'm not going to get into that here because everyone has different views about the subject and internet debates never end well, but yes, let's just say that there are also quite a few bones books on my shelf. I'm going on a two day osteoarchaeology course in June and I'm super excited about that.

Right now I'm working on two three thousand word essays; one about Neanderthals and one about human remains. Both of them have to be in at the start of May so there is much typing and even more reading happening. After that I have a month off from studying so I'm hoping to have a beadmaking splurge then.

Anyway, I've probably bored you enough with my archaeoramblings. I'd best get back to the essay-writing thing. See you!

Past = Future

I've never been a planner. I'm not one of those people with a grand life plan in which certain targets have to be achieved within a particular timescale. This is partly because this involves being super-organised, and I'm just not, and partly because nobody knows what life has in store and what is, or isn't, around the next corner that could throw your carefully-made plans into disarray.

I've always kind of bimbled along, doing life as it happens, the way I want to do it, rather than adhering to the 'norm'. Why do things because others do them, or because I feel I should do them? I've never wanted children. I just don't. I've got nothing against kids, but having my own is just not for me. I don't drink. I've got no problem if you do; it's just I hate the taste and effects of booze and would rather have a cup of tea or an orange squash. I don't drive a car. Being behind the wheel of one makes me so nervous and anxious it's not worth my stress and worry. I never went to university. I was going to; I had a place to study graphic design at the University of Portsmouth but when the time came it just didn't feel right and I started a mailing and print finishing business with my mum instead.

I've only just got married. Chris and I have been together for ten years and we got wed in November. Again, it wasn't your 'normal' wedding because neither of us wanted to do that. We didn't want fuss and fanfare. I wore blue, we had thirteen guests, a civil ceremony that involved the Terry & June theme tune, a meal at Jamie's Italian, no speeches or toasts, and then drinks back at the Premier Inn bar. And it was lovely. (This paragraph was mainly my way of telling you that I finally got married.)

We got married, see?

What I'm saying, in a long-winded way, is that I wait for stuff to happen in its own time, rather than trying to make it happen. I quite enjoy letting my life meander and unfold, letting one thing lead to another, a bit like listening to one artist or band, reading and learning about them and seeing which artist or band that leads me to listening to next. I've always been the same with my beads. I started off faffing with seed beads, reading bead books and magazines, then reading about how glass beads are made, then slowly gathering kit and glass and knowledge and skills, learning from the glass and my mistakes, growing my collection of tools and equipment as I went. I'm still learning from the glass and my mistakes, and I can't ever see that changing. Just this week I had an "A-ha!" moment (not in the Morten Harket or Alan Partridge sense) when an encasing technique that has long eluded me clicked into place.

And so to my impending degree course in Archaeology. I've always loved history. When it came to choosing my GCSE subjects, History was one of my second choices but ultimately ended up being the subject I enjoyed the most, even more than art. I did an Art History A-level at college which combined two things I love but that is where my formal history education stopped. I've always been partial to historical telly programmes and books. I love finding out how we got to where we are today. The history behind everyday objects—basic things like cooking pots and clothing fasteners and buckles—really fascinates me. I've forever been interested in our language and how the words we use today link back to our past too.

I've lived in Cambridge for over six years. We live here because Chris has a very good job here and as long as I have a shed, I can work anywhere. Cambridge is great; it's a lovely city and I like living in it. However, Chris aside, I have no family or friends here, so I don't see many people on a day-to-day basis which is sort of fine for me because I like my own company, and seventy-eight percent of humans irk me anyway, so it's OK. Last year I realised that I spend far too much time on social media talking to people in a virtual sense. That's great and it has its place, but I find that social media is becoming more poisonous and real-life-affecting with every Facebook check, browse of Twitter, or scroll through Instagram. I don't want to read constant, long, angry rants about Trump or whichever person has done or said a bad thing. I get it; you're a decent human being with good morals – if you weren't, I probably wouldn't be following you on social media. I also don't need to know that someone is having their second coffee of the day and to see a photo of a Starbucks cup to prove it. Anyway, in short, I find myself annoyed by social media more often than I am entertained by it. That video of the cat being dragged around a house in a cardboard box to a jaunty Japanese pop song, whilst wearing a hat made out of its own fur, though? That's FINE.

So yes, I'd reached a point where the internet was giving me rage and annoyance on far too regular a basis, and Chris aside, Diane and Karen who work at the local Post Office were the real life people I spoke to the most. Nothing against Diane and Karen, I mean they're just lovely, but I needed to do something about my lack of interaction with other actual people. So I Googled about for local history groups. How better to learn about the place in which you find yourself living, than to discuss it with other people? In searching for local history groups I stumbled upon a very local (like a seven minute walk away local) community archaeology group. It reminded me of seeing the ad for the 'make your own glass beads' lampwork kit in the back of Bead & Button all those years ago and I was all "What? I can actually make beads? In my home? Me?" Yeah, it was like that but "What? I can actually dig up olden stuff? Without qualifications or having to apply to Tony Robinson? Me?" instead. So I emailed them and went along and joined the group.

Well, that was it.

Those archaeology people are my people! Once a month we meet up and drink tea and talk about historical stuff. And in between those meetings we go to talks by other people who like and know history. And sometimes we go to see people who've dug up stuff. And sometimes we get to do the actual digging-up of stuff!

There it was. Years and years of bimbling along through life not knowing that archaeology was a thing for me but suddenly realising it is. It really is. All those television programmes, books, looking-up of things, and that need to know how and why we are the us that we are (that makes sense in my head) all coming together and making an electrical brain circuit of BINGO!

My first dig at the Leper Chapel in Cambridge. I helped to unearth a medieval trackway. Those light patches of stone are the track. Lots of trowel and brush action required.

After a few months of group meetings and talks, and after my first archaeological dig in a field next to a medieval leper chapel, I decided I needed to learn more. Properly learn. And so I applied to study for a BA in Archaeology at the University of Leicester. It's a full-time distance learning course which incorporates a few weeks of practical experience. I'm fully aware that doing the course alongside my beads is going to be hard work (people love pointing that out to me) but I'll be studying a subject that fascinates me and that I love, which is more than can be said for the degree course I didn't do when I was eighteen, and I've never been one to shy away from a challenge or hard work, so I shall see how it goes and adjust and re-jig my other life stuff accordingly.

Does this mean that I'll eventually give up the beads? I don't know. Nobody does. Like everything I've ever done since the age of eighteen, I shall see where it takes me. If I get a good degree, maybe I'll go part-time with the beads and get a part-time job in one of Cambridge's many museums. Or maybe I'll get into development-led archaeology for a living. Or perhaps archaeology will just end up being A Thing That I Know A Lot About. Who knows? As the first four paragraphs of this blog post demonstrate, I am one of life's bimblers. For the next three years I'll be bimbling with a purpose. I don't know for sure where I'm going with the archaeology but I'll know I've got there when I get there and when I am there, I'll let you know.

A few changes

Hello, Merry Christmas, Happy New Year etc!

I'm just doing a quick post to let you know about a couple of bead tweaks I'm making. In February I am starting a full-time distance learning degree in Archaeology with the University of Leicester. This means I will have to make a couple of Beads By Laura changes. (I will explain this archaeology development in a separate blog post.)

Firstly, I am not offering tuition for the foreseeable future. I am teaching at MangoBeads at the end of this month (and there are a couple of places left) but after that, I am taking zero tuition bookings.

Secondly, I am cutting back on the amount of bead 'sets' I make. There will still be sets but I am going to sell some beads as singles. That way I can make a bunch of beads in one design and you can buy one, a pair, or several of them. And if you're thinking "No way am I paying a couple of quid for one bead and then £1.99 postage on top!" then panic not; I am now offering FREE Royal Mail 2nd Class postage to UK addresses.

It's going to take me a while to get into a routine; I have an idea in my head of how studying for a degree alongside running a business might work, but until I actually start doing it, I shan't know for certain. The best way to keep updated with beads is to regularly check this here website, or to follow me on Facebook, Instagram and Twitter. You can also sign up to my mailing list for sort-of-monthly updates and discount codes.

The photo at the top of this post is of some 'Stormcloud' beads which are currently available as singles. There are a few other beads for sale too. All of them can be found in my shop.